Here is what you need to know about Pitbull:

1. His real name is Armando Christian Perez.

2. He is a rapper with four singles that have entered the top 10 of the Billboard Hot 100 charts.

3. His rapping has been present in some of the singles that have graced radio in recent memory. Examples are Jennifer Lopez’ On The Floor, Usher’s DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love, and Alexandra Burke’s All Night Long.

Enough with the numerated statements. Let us start with what this post is really about.

As the title suggests, Pitbull never ceases in disappointing people with his music. If you would force yours truly to add a 4th statement to the list above, I would never hesitate to add this: “He has the ability to ruin songs effortlessly.”

Let us dissect Pitbull’s lines in his recent appearances. Let us start things with All Night Long by X-Factor winner Alexandra Burke.

As I was searching for the lyrics of the track, I found out that the lyric sites only have Alexandra’s verses – no sight of Pitbull’s rapped lines whatsoever. That only meant Pitbull’s parts might have been misunderstood and are thus prone to being misheard. I tried my best to decipher what he said in the track and here’s what I came up with:

1. A part with the words “See, I met you at the bar / Introduced myself as Bulldog” exists. This ain’t a cruel joke meant to lead you to spiraling depression. Pitbull did say those lines. Oh the sheer smartness of the line makes you jump with joy. Not.

2. Pitbull also says “I’m ready to unleash the beast.” Yes, you read that right. You might be asking what kind of beast is unleashed by Pitbull. Probably, this beast is actually the source of Pitbull’s talent to ruin every song in which he appears.

Pitbull also appeared in Usher’s DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love. On the contrary, I had a much easier time digging up lyric sites for Pitbull’s verses. Apparently, the people understood what he said this time.

1. The line “Hear no evil, or speak no evil, or see no evil” got my eyes twitching. Why? As PopJustice says, Pitbull’s presence reminds us of the presence of evil and that “the fight will never be over.”

2. “My life is a movie and you just TiVo” – this got me asking: What kind of movie are you living then? Is it a B movie? Is it a C movie? Is it a Z movie? Pitbull never ceases in spicing up our intellectual juices.

Enrique Iglesias thought he needed Pitbull’s services in a single of his. Thus, a collaboration with Pitbull is formed with the inception of I Like It.

1. Another ridiculous line appears in the form of “I see you watching me, you see me watching you“. The logic police obviously went AWOL in this line. Probably, Pitbull unleashed his beast on them and the logic police got traumatized.

2. Nice attempt on churning out current news events with the Tiger Woods reference. Oh please.

3. A version of I Like It without Pitbull exists and it is much better than the version with his presence. That is a fact.

Of course, I would not forget including Pitbull’s appearance on Jennifer Lopez’ On The Floor.

1. What does “Donkey Konged” mean?

2. “My name ain’t Keith but I see why you Sweat me” – OH COME ON. Can’t you come up with something more sensible? Goodness gracious.

But then, we should not be surprised. After all, all of these lines come from a guy who loved saying “I know you want me / I know I want you” repeatedly even if that meant actually turning the person off. He never ceases in disappointing people. On The Floor by J.Lo would have been an awesome single but then Pitbull’s unnecessary intrusion made things worse. Come to think of it, if you remove Pitbull in the tracks where he is featured, the track would be great.

This is a great example of a track being great if Pitbull’s parts are removed. This is On The Floor without any trace of Pitbull whatsoever. It sounds much better in my honest opinion. Hearing J.Lo do her thing without any unnecessary rapping is definitely a treat.

Does it mean I loathe Pitbull to death? On the contrary, no. However, he is a “fun sucker.” He destroys all the good vibes going on in every track in which he participates. It is really a sad case that will not stop if the trend continues. But still, take it for whatever it is but Pitbull will still remain alive and kicking in the industry for some people actually love whatever he does.